[quote=""Leyland""]Now Zamfir and his pan flute .... he was da bomb![/quote]
I also dislike New age music....especially Yanni....Zamfir.... His K-Tel greatest hits what a hoot....
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Good jokes and other funny stuff
Porn for women?
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Only the pure of heart can make good soup. - Beethoven
More porn ;)
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Only the pure of heart can make good soup. - Beethoven
- SonjaMarie
- Bibliomaniac
- Posts: 5688
- Joined: August 2008
- Location: Vashon, WA
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*SNORT!* Now you're talking! WHOO HOO!
SM
SM
The Lady Jane Grey Internet Museum
My Booksfree Queue
Original Join Date: Mar 2006
Previous Amount of Posts: 2,517
Books Read In 2014: 109 - June: 17 (May: 17)
Full List Here: http://www.historicalfictiononline.com/ ... p?p=114965
My Booksfree Queue
Original Join Date: Mar 2006
Previous Amount of Posts: 2,517
Books Read In 2014: 109 - June: 17 (May: 17)
Full List Here: http://www.historicalfictiononline.com/ ... p?p=114965
UPS Airlines
After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this air craft.
P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Can not reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what frict ion locks are for.
P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search
P : Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this air craft.
P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Can not reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what frict ion locks are for.
P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search
P : Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget
We are the music makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams ~ Arthur O'Shaughnessy, Ode
- MLE (Emily Cotton)
- Bibliomaniac
- Posts: 3566
- Joined: August 2008
- Interest in HF: started in childhood with the classics, which, IMHO are HF even if they were contemporary when written.
- Favourite HF book: Prince of Foxes, by Samuel Shellabarger
- Preferred HF: Currently prefer 1600 and earlier, but I'll read anything that keeps me turning the page.
- Location: California Bay Area
My husband was president of a small nonprofit flying co-op for years, and that one has caused many a laugh. But the original was Quantas airlines, not UPS, and in fact it is Quantas that has never had a serious accident. (Although they might have had one lately -- the memory is jiggling at some news item a year or so back where I was thinking, "Oh, no, there goes a perfect record...")
Equine Romance
For those who like a little chick-lit...
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Only the pure of heart can make good soup. - Beethoven
Men as romance writers
If men decided to write romance novels....hmmm?
Hope you can see this ok?
Hope you can see this ok?
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Only the pure of heart can make good soup. - Beethoven
- diamondlil
- Bibliomaniac
- Posts: 2642
- Joined: August 2008
Very funny!
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There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.
Edith Wharton
All things Historical Fiction - Historical Tapestry
There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.
Edith Wharton